Dear Jasmine,
I am about to graduate from high school next year. My parents want me to go to college and get a degree but I do not want to go to college and I want to join the army. My parents are really against this and don’t want me to join the army for reasons such as my safety, etc. My parents think that I am planning on attending college but I really don’t want to. I am not sure what I should do because I do not want to upset my parents.
Bob M.
Las Vegas, NV
Dear Bob,
It is really important for you to do something you are passionate about. College is not for everyone and if you really think that joining the army is something you want to do then I think you need to tell your parents about your decision. From my understanding the army does pay for college after you are done so let your parents know that you may consider going to college after because the truth is getting an education is important to your future so it is something you should strongly consider. Think this through and consider all your options and don’t rule out the possibility of going to college and getting an education as a safety net for your future.
Always here,
Jasmine
Tagged Advice, army, college, future, Help, Life, parents, Problem, School, support, upset
Dear Jasmine,
I definitely need some advice on this one. When I was young I married my childhood sweetheart. Unfortunately it did not last for more than a year. We were young and both were not ready to settle down. He was cheating and I found myself doing the same thing but only with his older brother. We had a connection but he (older brother) knew not to let it go any further.
I got divorced and moved out of state and remarried and have 2 great young adult children. I am currently divorced about 9 years now. I moved back closer to my home town and a few months ago I met up with my first husbands older brother. Well we have been seeing each other for the past month or so and it is so great.
We have connected and he is just so wonderful, the only problem is his family and mine. My first ex husband hated me and now he knows I am seeing his brother and he is very upset even though it has been 25 years. His mother was upset and did not like me after the trauma went on.
We really fell in love with each other. I guess I just don’t know what to do about how the families will react to this and how do I go about meeting up again with his mom. He is really close to his mother more so than the other boys so it is touchy. What do you think? Maybe I should run! This is just so crazy!
Your input would be greatly appreciated.
B.W.
Dear B,
It is not surprising that his problem would react so negatively since you two did end things badly. I think that you two are grown mature adults now and if you two want to be together, you two need to face up to the fact that not everyone is going to like it and be able to accept that. When the time comes and you need to approach his mother, just be mature about it. Sit her down and let her know that you know that mistakes were made in the past when you were young but you have grown and matured. Let her know your intentions with her son are genuine and you hope that you two can work things out and rebuild a new relationship with each other.
It won’t be easy and she may not react the way you want her to but don’t let that deter you from doing it. Just understand her reaction is understandable because she doesn’t want her son to be hurt by anyone, especially someone who she believes hurt one of her sons before. Give it time and see how things go but don’t let it affect your relationship with your boyfriend. It may work out at the end and it may not, that is a risk that you must be willing to take if you want to maintain the relationship.
Always here,
Jasmine
Tagged Advice, Boyfriend, Cheated, Cheating, divorce, Family, hate, Help, Husband, Marriage, Problem, suppot, Wife
Dear Jasmine,
I found out that my boss is cheating on his wife. I don’t know his wife that well but I do see her sometimes when she stops by the office or at other job related functions. Lately we have even gotten lunch together and seem to have a much friendlier relationship. I am torn because I feel so guilty that I know my boss is cheating on her. I don’t want to lose her friendship or my job and I don’t know what I should do.
Beth E.
Fresno, CA
Dear Beth,
These types of things are never easy but for your sake I think you need to mind your own business. If she asks you point blank and you don’t want to lie, then you will risk losing your job. If you lie to her, then you risk losing a friend if she finds out that you knew this whole time and never told her. Did you ever think she could be befriending you to find out information about her husbands whereabouts? She may already think he is cheating and trying to find out.
I would encourage you not to maintain such a close relationship with her because it could create a lot of drama if everything unfolds. Sometimes it is just better to keep your work and your personal life separate.
Always here,
Jasmine
Tagged Advice, Boss, career, Cheating, Friend, Help, Husband, lose, Problem, support, Wife, Work
Dear Jasmine,
I think my brother is having trouble at school because sometimes I don’t see him in school. My parents don’t get home until late at night and sometimes I am at home by myself when my brother is supposed to be watching me. He told me to tell my parents that he was doing something when they would call so he wouldn’t get in trouble. I am not sure where he goes or what he is doing but he gets home before my parents get home. What do you think I should do? I don’t want to get my brother into trouble but I don’t like being at home by myself all the time either.
Tim K.
Portland, OR
Dear Tim,
I think the first thing you need to do is let your parents know what is going on because it is not safe for you to be at home by yourself, nor is it safe for your brother to be out without your parents knowing where he is at. Your brother needs to learn to be responsible and take care of his responsibility. If your brother doesn’t want to watch you all the time, he could work something out with your parents sometimes where he is allowed to go out and you could stay with a friend or relative. Whatever the case may be you should not be staying at home by yourself unsupervised.
Always here,
Jasmine
Dear Jasmine,
Ever since I had my son, my husband has paid a lot more attention to him then he does to our daughter. I can see my daughter trying to get his attention at times and he is too involved with our son to notice. I try to give her more attention to try to make up for the lack of attention my husband gives her but I don’t think she notices it.
I tried talking to my husband but he thinks that I am over reacting about the whole situation. I am not sure what I should do about it anymore. I don’t want my daughter growing feeling like her father neglected her and I don’t want my son to grow up spoiled with his fathers attention.
Gloria R.
New Haven, CT
Dear Gloria,
You need to sit your husband down and let him know that his behavior is affecting your daughter. He needs to also spend time with his daughter too and perhaps you could help them get reconnected by setting up some playtime for the both of them while you spend some time with your son. Explain to him that you don’t want your daughter to feel neglected and also you don’t want your son to grow up spoiled with his attention. Let him know it is serious and he needs to wise up because he needs to care for and pay attention to his children equally.
Always here,
Jasmine
Tagged Advice, Children, daughter, Family, Help, Husband, neglect, Problem, son, spoiled, support, Wife
