Dear Jasmine
I am involved in a very horrible love triangle. I am seeing a married woman with two children and a younger girl with an ex boyfriend she can’t leave. We all work together. My problem is that I like them both.
They both bring me something that I can’t find in a complete woman. One brings me comfort and passion. The other brings fun and excitement. The younger girl, I would truly love to be with, but her ex boyfriend still controls her life.
The married one is the one I could be with for all the days to come, but she is married. I want to leave them both, but I feel like I am going to be losing out. Am I being selfish? What should I do?
Ule
Glen Burnie, MD
Dear Ule,
Are you selfish? Maybe. One thing for darn sure is, that you are in love with drama. The problem isn’t you like them both. The problem is you love drama! Not only are you involved in these destructive drama filled relationships, you guys all work together! If that is not just asking for drama, I don’t know what is.
You are in a fantasyland right now if you think either of these women are even right for you. Both these women are obviously not emotionally stable enough to maintain a real relationship, not that I think you want to have one, otherwise you wouldn’t be with them both. But the right women would encompass qualities you find in both these women.
They are both obviously wrong for you, but you are drawn to them because you crave the drama that comes from being with the both of them. What you need is a stable relationship, but I am not even sure if you know what that is or even if you want that. Are you even ready to be in a relationship freed of this self-created drama?
You can easily get rid of all these drama but breaking up with them both but I doubt you will because you like all the trouble and excitement it brings to your life. Perhaps you need to find excitement in other aspects of your life that doesn’t involve creating trouble for yourself and others.
Always here,
Jasmine
