Dear Jasmine,
I am a 35 year old woman and have been married for 10 years. About 2 years ago I slept with my friend’s wife. It was a mistake. We were drinking and one thing lead to another. I felt really bad and started distancing myself from her.
Well she ended up telling my friend, I assumed out of fear that I would tell him, or she may have been mad at me for breaking off out friendship. About a year later we talked about it and we remained friends.
He explained to me that wasn’t her first time in being caught in something liked that he said that he was very angry at the time but he forgave me. We would call and check on each other from time to time, that sort of thing.
As soon as she found out we remained friends she was upset and very angry. She has recently called my husband and told him the story of us sleeping together. He never gave me a chance to explain he moved out.
My friend even called him to somehow help. It hurts because I have 2 wonderful kids that’s being affected by my mistake and her selfishness. I called her and told her that I will retaliate she claimed she’s contacted the police but I’m not sure.
I’m so angry right now! What should I do? I want her to hurt just as much as I am right now.
Sasha N.
Sandy Springs GA
USA
Dear Sasha,
As much as you are hurt, your children are the real victims here. Instead of concentrating your angry on your friend, you need to concentrate your energy on your children because I am sure they are much more affected by this then you are.
I am not sure if you are trying to work on things with your husband or even if he is willing to work things out. You made a mistake and you need to own up to it. If he is willing to work on your relationship and rebuild the trust then you need to focus on that and making your family whole again.
I know you are not in a good place right now and you are angry. I can understand that but as much anger you feel towards here is not going to change what you did and what she did. All you can focus on is the future and the future of your relationship with your husband and your children.
Don’t focus on trying to hurt your friend because it will do you no good. Focus whatever energy you have on something positive, which is trying to rebuild your relationship with your husband and helping your children cope with what has happened.
Always here,
Jasmine
