Dear Jasmine,
I am 21, and last year broke up with my boyfriend of several years and we were planning on getting married last year. However, he ended our relationship upon finding out that I was pregnant. He accused me of being unfaithful, which I have been or never will be, even though it was he who has been unfaithful time and time again.
I have now found out that he is married to someone else. Anyway, after he broke up with me I had an abortion against my morals and I want him to assist me in paying the bill.
How can i do this, we don’t speak any longer.
Sara
Queens,NY
Dear Sara,
It is a good thing he is no longer in your life now because it sounds like he is not a good person for you to be with at all. When you had the abortion, did he agree to pay you for it? I assume you got an abortion because you did not want to deal with raising this child with him especially since he is not a loyal person and didn’t seem to treat you right.
If you guys are not speaking now, you can still contact him and ask him to pay his portion for the abortion. However, if you did not discuss this with him prior to getting the abortion, he may not want to pay for it, especially because he was claiming it was not even his child. If you really do need the money, then I would say take legal action, but it may end up costing you more money. If not and he just won’t budge, take it as a lesson learned and move on with your life from anything that has to do with him.
You are still very young and I am sure this experience has caused you great stress. I suggest you try to quickly get this over and done with because the sooner you leave everything in the past, so you can start the healing process. It can’t be easy, especially since you were with your ex-boyfriend for such a long time and got pregnant. If you having trouble dealing with your abortion and the whole situation, I would suggest you get some counseling and work through them because you went through a great deal and it can’t be easy to find out he is married, even though you are better off without him.
Always here,
Jasmine
