Dear Jasmine,
It’s been about six months now since I broke up with my ex-girlfriend. We kind of broke up on bad terms and I feel terrible for what I did but I really do miss her. I think about all the times we’ve had in the past and the direction we were heading in.
I guess my question to you is should I try to make things up with her or should I just drop it? I saw her at my friend’s wedding about a month ago and she was just as beautiful as she’s ever been. She came up to me and said hello and that was that.
Every night I think about her and she’s become the “what if†of my life. We never had any real closure from after we broke up due to some circumstances. I would love to have her back in my life or at least another shot of getting back with her. I’ve recently been seeing this other girl, but I don’t feel like it’s fair to her that I miss my ex while I’m seeing this new girl. She’s ok and all but she just doesn’t amount to what I’m looking for. She knows of my situation, so she understands a little bit.
Sincerely,
Mac
San Diego, CA
Dear Mac,
If you are still having doubts and feelings about your ex girlfriend, the first thing I would do is break it off with the girl you are seeing. Don’t give her the lingering hope that you are going to get over your ex girlfriend because the truth is you don’t know when you will be over her. Even though she is understanding of the situation, I think she may be just setting herself up to get hurt and if you care for her you should just break it off and work on your situation with your ex girlfriend.
In regards to your ex girlfriend, it seems as if you have been thinking a lot about her lately. What I would suggest you do is to talk to her. It may be you want to get back with her or it may be you need the closure before you can move on. Whichever one it may be, you should talk to her and let her know how you have been feeling. If you want to get back with her, then bring it up to her and let her know how you feel. See if she still feels the same for you or not.
If you just want to be friends with her and have her in your life then I would just suggest you talk to her and give you both closure from the relationship and try to move on from there. If she is comfortable with being your friend then I would move on from there and build on your friendship.
I don’t see the harm in approaching her in either situation because it will give you some sort of closure. Even if she doesn’t want to be friends or get back with you, at least you will know and not regret not doing it. You already are asking yourself “what if†after your breakup, don’t torture yourself by asking yourself “what if†if you don’t talk to her about it now.
Always here,
Jasmine
